


Living as Rose

by Daughter_of_Scotland



Series: Various Shows Short Stories [7]
Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-02
Updated: 2012-06-02
Packaged: 2017-11-06 16:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/420870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daughter_of_Scotland/pseuds/Daughter_of_Scotland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A few thought's of Rose after losing the Doctor. Takes place after "Doomsday".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Living as Rose

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Nothing's mine.

I remember.  
Always, every day, every minute, every second, I remember.  
I have seen the end of the world and how the humans survived it.  
I have seen Ghosts and Aliens, been possessed by the self-claimed last human, have helped to save the life of Queen Victoria and have killed with the power of the time vortex.  
I don’t need all of that. I would give it up, every memory of it, just to be with him again.

I remember how I have seen him last, in the flesh, reaching and crying out for me, looking so desperate and lost.  
I remember noticing the changes between the two forms I know of him.  
The one who was so cheerful, so gloating, even in the face of death. The one who danced.  
And the one who was more sinister, more caring, who could get enraged so easily. The one who cried.

I love him.  
All of him, no matter the form, no matter the appearance, no matter his character.  
I love the Doctor.  
And I need to believe that he loved me too. I need to believe that his last words would have been “I love you, too”.  
If I don’t believe that, then what is there left for me?

Minutes became Hours. Hours became Days. Days became Months. Months became Years.  
I had to stop crying eventually. I am head of Torchwood London now, the new one Pete, Mickey and I built. I save the world time and again.  
Rose Tyler. Defender of the Earth.  
A news paper actually called me that some months ago. I couldn’t eat for a week after it.

I miss him and it hurts. It’s like a constant aching starting in my stomach, moving up to my lungs and settling in my heart.  
Mum never says that it will end eventually. She knows it won’t. So does Mickey. That’s why he never gave me the ring and asked to marry him, even if he wants to.  
Some days I am so out of breath just by existing I can’t get out of bed without fainting. I will just lay there, close my eyes and picture his face in every aspect. Reconstruct every conversation we shared, treasure every moment we spent together.

He wanted me to live a magnificent life and be happy. To have the one adventure he will never have.  
But how can I do that when I wake up hearing his voice calling out to me and have to bind me to my bed so I do not jump in my car and drive and drive and drive until I find him?  
The time with him changed me, it made my life worthwhile.

So how can I spend it without him? I have forgotten how to live this way.  
He is my Doctor, my love, my lifesaver.  
He gave me meaning and when I lost him I lost half of my soul, the one which made me a living being.

And even when I grow older, maybe become a mum, a granny, even when I am on the verge of death…  
I will always be his Rose. Brilliant, magnificent, a time traveller.  
The doctor’s companion who loved him so much she would have given her life for him any time.


End file.
